Escape to Paradise: Luxury Lodge & Stunning Woodland Views in Tenby
Escape to Paradise: More Like a Pleasant Dream Than a Reality… Mostly. (A Tenby Lodge Review That's Honestly Messy)
Okay, buckle up, because I’m about to try and decipher my recent experience at “Escape to Paradise” in Tenby. Honestly, the name is HIGHLY ambitious. Luxury? Maybe. Paradise? Let's just say it was more like a very pleasant dream punctuated by the occasional logistical hiccup. Don't get me wrong, the woodland views themselves could induce nirvana. But let's dissect this thing, shall we?
SEO & Metadata (Ugh, the boring bits first – bear with me!):
- Keywords: Tenby Lodges, Luxury Lodges Pembrokeshire, Wheelchair Accessible Lodges, Spa Hotel Tenby, Woodland Views, Pet-Friendly Lodges, Accessible Accommodation Pembrokeshire, Welsh Holiday, Spa Break Wales, Family Holiday Tenby, Restaurant with a View Tenby.
- Meta Description: Escape to Paradise: A review of a lodge in Tenby. Offers stunning woodland views, spa facilities, wheelchair accessibility, and a mixed bag of experiences! Find out if it's a truly luxurious escape or a slightly flawed gem. Read on for a brutally honest take!
The Grand Entrance & The Accessibility Question - A Bit of a Rollercoaster:
Right, so the initial drive was idyllic. Winding lanes, the scent of sea salt… and suddenly, BAM! A sign proclaiming “Escape to Paradise.” Heart rate accelerated. But, and there's always a but, isn't there? I’m reviewing this with a friend who uses a wheelchair, so Accessibility was a huge factor. The website promised fully accessible lodging, and while the reception area was fine (Elevator? Check. Ramps? Mostly check, although one was a bit steep), let's just say getting to our particular lodge felt like a mini-expedition. There were slopes to navigate, narrow pathways, and a definite lack of signage at one point. We legit had to back track. Facilities for disabled guests were marked but not always perfectly implemented. My friend handled it brilliantly, but be prepared for some mild maneuvering.
On-site Accessible Restaurants / Lounges: I'd say it was attempts at accessibility, not perfectly achieved, but with a great attitude of willing ness
The Room Itself - A Mixed Bag of Bliss & Minor Annoyances:
Okay, the room. The Non-smoking rooms were definitely smoky-smell free, Thankfully. The Air conditioning was a lifesaver because the windows did not allow for air flow well. I'm obsessed with good sleep, so the Blackout curtains were my best friend. Score! The Bed was huge. Extra long bed indeed! The Seating area, with its plush Sofa, was perfect for collapsing after a day of exploration. Complimentary tea and Coffee/tea maker were a nice touch, although the coffee tasted suspiciously like dishwater. Let's not forget the Free bottled water. Little things, but they add up.
The bathroom… hmm. The Bathtub, while beautiful, would be completely inaccessible for a wheelchair user. The Separate shower/bathtub setup was more for decoration than practicality. The Toiletries were pretty fancy, though!
But then the small stuff kicked in. My Alarm clock was broken. The Internet access – wireless was patchy at best (forget about the Internet access – LAN). And the Carpet felt slightly damp. Minor gripes, honestly, but they pulled me out of the “luxury” bubble occasionally.
Internet Woes and Wi-Fi Frenzy – A Modern-Day Tragedy?
The Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! was a blatant lie. I’m talking dial-up era speeds. I swear, I could have knitted a sweater faster than loading a webpage. This is a huge deal in today's world. I needed to work a bit, so, yeah… not ideal. Wi-Fi in public areas fared little better. I ended up using all my data, which is expensive and a pain. Thank goodness for data roaming…
The Stuff To Do - Spa, Sauna, and… Oh Yeah, Actual Life:
Okay, the good stuff! The Swimming pool [outdoor]… AMAZING. The Pool with view lived up to expectations. Pure bliss, looking out over those goddamn gorgeous woodlands. The Spa/sauna experience was… well, mostly amazing. I booked a Massage, and it was heavenly. Needed that Body scrub to get rid of the stress, and my skin felt amazing afterwards. The Steamroom was a nice add-on too. The Sauna was hot and relaxing. I didn't try the Foot bath, but it looked tempting.
Then I tried using the Fitness center! OMG. Totally inadequate. There were a few machines, the space was confined, and it just felt… a bit depressing, to be honest.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking – A Culinary Adventure (Sometimes):
The Restaurants were mostly great. I had to try the Buffet in restaurant, and it was alright! The A la carte in restaurant was a higher quality experience, I especially loved the desserts in restaurant. The Bar was lively, the Poolside bar was perfect for pre-dinner cocktails. The Asian cuisine in restaurant was a fun twist on a standard menu. I especially enjoy the Coffee/tea in restaurant because of high quality. The Bottle of water was essential. I would have liked the Happy hour, but missed it! I'm not really into Soup in restaurant, but my companion loved it!
I did order Room service [24-hour] once and the food was a bit sad, to be honest.
Cleanliness & Safety – The V Word (COVID-19 Edition):
This is where Escape to Paradise REALLY shined. The Anti-viral cleaning products were definitely in use. Daily disinfection in common areas was obvious. The staff were all masked up and you could not get close to anything. The Hand sanitizer was everywhere. It was a very reassuring level of hygiene. I didn't observe the Physical distancing of at least 1 meter all the time, but the effort was definitely there. They'd removed the Shared stationery, and that was a good call. I didn't see any Individually-wrapped food options, but the general vibe was very, very clean.
Services and Conveniences – The Little Things That Matter (Or Don’t):
Daily housekeeping was excellent, although I kept finding my towels folded into those ridiculous swan shapes. Luggage storage was helpful. I had a Convenience store but didn't use it. I also had the ability to have Food delivery. I didn't make use of it. I would have loved a Business facility, but it was non existent.
For the Kids – Did Escape to Paradise Deliver? (I’m not a parent, but…)
They advertised being family/child friendly and offered Babysitting service and Kids meal.
Getting Around – The Parking Panic and Other Transportation Trials:
The Car park [free of charge] was a godsend. Car park [on-site] saved us from having to park far. We didn't use the Taxi service or Valet parking, but the option was there.
The Verdict: Escape to “Mostly Pleasant”
Look, you could definitely have a good time at Escape to Paradise. The setting is stunning, the spa is generally excellent, the cleanliness is top-notch, and the staff are friendly. But it's not quite the seamless luxury experience they're aiming for. It's quirky, a little rough around the edges, and the accessibility could be improved. The internet situation is a total joke. Would I go back? Probably. But I'd pack my own pocket Wi-Fi and lower my expectations a fraction. Still, the woodland views alone are almost worth the price of admission. Almost.
Luxury Escape Awaits: Thani Residence Chonburi, Thailand
Alright, buckle up buttercups! This isn't your sterile, pre-packaged itinerary. This is my chaotic, possibly-slightly-unhinged, but hopefully hilarious and ultimately real account of my trip to The Rowan in Tenby, Wales. Let's see if I survive… and if the woodland views live up to the hype.
Day 1: Arrival & Tentative Calm (Pre-Caffeine Edition)
- 14:00: Arrive at The Rowan. Okay, first impressions? Gorgeous. Like, postcard-worthy gorgeous. The lodge is all clapboard and charm and I'm already mentally preparing for the Instagram onslaught. Found the key, wrestled with the door (always a good start), and fumbled my way inside. First thing? Unpack. That’s a lie. First thing was a desperate search for the kettle.
- 14:30: Found the kettle, victory is mine! Cup of tea in hand, finally had a look around. The "woodland views" from the balcony are… well, they are woodland views. Trees. Green. Potentially populated by gnomes. I'm not judging, but I'm also stocking up on tinfoil hats.
- 15:00: Settling in. Trying to remember how to adult. Failed successfully. Opened a bottle of local cider. It tastes like… well, cider. Definitely not complaining.
- 15:30: A walk to explore the grounds. I got a bit lost almost immediately. A slight detour (read: a wrong turn and a mild panic attack) before finding my way back. It was a good exercise in self-reliance, even if my self-reliance took a scenic route.
- 16:00-18:00: Unpacked, arranged my clothes (because OCD) and wrote a list of places I wanted to visit.
- 19:00: Dinner at a little restaurant in Tenby - Plants (vegetarian). Ordered the Vegan Wellington. It was the best thing I ate in months (maybe years).
Day 2: Coastal Capers & Whale's Eye View (Mostly of Sand)
- 08:00: Coffee. Sweet, sweet coffee. I’m starting to believe I actually need it to function. The woodland views from the balcony look slightly less terrifying this morning. Possibly because I'm caffeinated.
- 09:00: A walk to the beach. That's the plan, anyway. I envisioned a graceful me walking along the shore. What actually happened? Struggling to take my feet on the sand, almost falling into the sea. So glad I wore the perfect outfit for that… or not.
- 09:30-12:00: The beach! It was everything I hoped for. Maybe even better! Wandered along the coast path, took pictures, and got hopelessly lost in the vast expanse of the ocean. The wind was a bit wicked, but the sheer scale of everything kept me staring and staring and staring.
- 12:00: Okay, here’s where things got interesting. Spotted a little ice cream shop. Decided it was a perfect spot to have lunch. After all, chocolate ice cream is not a dessert, but a lifestyle.
- 13:00: Back to the lodge to freshen up. Made a quick lunch - a sandwich (perfected that art).
- 14:00-16:00: Afternoon tea at the Lodge. Absolutely heavenly.
- 19:00: Dinner at a restaurant in Tenby - The Cove. Ordered the seafood platter. It was okay. Not as good as the sandwich I had for lunch.
Day 3: Local Legends & Cliffside Angst (And a Dog)
- 09:00: Another day, another coffee. Starting to feel like I'm permanently attached to a caffeine drip. This time the woodland views are starting to actually feel friendly, more like old friends than potential gnome habitats.
- 10:00: Exploring Tenby town. The harbour's lovely, all boats bobbing gently. Walked along the shops and found a great wool shop. Bought myself a ridiculously fluffy scarf. I love it.
- 11:00-13:00: Found a little art gallery in a hidden alley. Turns out, I’m terrible at art, so I just went into the gallery instead. Got to meet the artist.
- 13:30: Lunch at a lovely place. Simple sandwiches
- 15:00: Wandered the coast path, taking pictures, and just getting lost in the beauty.
- 17:00: The woodland views are back. I'm fairly certain I saw something move in the bushes. It might have been a squirrel. It might have been a gnome. I'm not going to investigate. That tinfoil hat is going to be put to good use.
- 19:00: Dinner, and a new book that I want to read.
Day 4: Farewell, Wales, You Beautiful, Chaotic Beast
- 09:00: The time has come. The final coffee. Saying goodbye to the woodland views and a deep breath full of longing.
- 09:30-11:00: Made final check of the lodge. Packed the bags, and did a final walk to remember everything.
- 11:00: Leaving the lodge. Sad.
- 11:30: On the way to the next destination, wishing I could stay longer.
Final Thoughts:
The Rowan? Stunning. The woodland views? Slightly spooky, but undeniably beautiful. Tenby? Utterly charming. This trip? A messy, delightful, and highly caffeinated success. I'll be back. And next time, I'm definitely bringing backup tinfoil hats.
Escape to Paradise: JAPA Suites & Villas, Bali Awaits!
Escape to Paradise: FAQ (and my chaotic thoughts on the whole thing)
Okay, so "Escape to Paradise" sounds… well, a bit *much*, doesn't it? Is it actually paradise, or just really good marketing?
What's the lodge *actually* like? Is it all rustic charm or modern luxury?
And the kitchen? Fully equipped. Theoretically, you *could* cook gourmet meals. I opted for microwaveable dinners mostly. Because, you know, vacation. Although, there were a couple of moments of ambition, that ended with a burnt offering that triggered the smoke alarm. The staff were remarkably understanding.
The Woodland Views sound great, but is it… lonely? Like, am I going to be stranded in the middle of nowhere?
I made a pact with myself to go for a walk every day. I lasted two days. The third day was a torrential downpour. And honestly, it was kind of cozy to just stay indoors and watch the rain lash against the windows. So, yeah, not *entirely* lonely. But if you are looking for a bustling social life, bring your own friends.
Is it really kid-friendly? I've got a toddler who's basically a furry tornado.
Tell me about Tenby, the town. What's there to *do*?
Was the service good? Like, did they actually care?
Anything you'd change or any downsides?
Would you recommend it? Seriously?
It's a place where you can truly unwind, reconnect with nature (as much as you can with a wifi connection), and just… breathe. If you need an escape, this is a brilliant choice. Book it. You won't regret it (unless you're really, really attached to constant, super-fast internet).Backpacker Hotel Find
